Happy Chaos Never Dies Day!
I learned about this little-known holiday from the corporate calendar that hangs in my cubicle. At first, I was a little panic-stricken to find out the powers that be at my company have chosen to tell all employees that the chaos in our lives will never go away.
However, since it’s Monday…and I’ve had to solve three crises before noon…and I don’t know what dinner is tonight…and my car hasn’t been washed in four months…and it might be Friday before any of us have clean clothes, I’ve decided to embrace the chaos! Today, I am raising my glass and celebrating all the crazy, completely-out-of-my-control things that happen each and every day.
The “TAKE HOME” Folder Black Hole. In an attempt to contain the miscellaneous papers/forms/bills/announcements I collect each day, I pile them into a folder that then I stuff into my computer bag at the end of the day. This is really just a clever disguise for all the things I intend to do when I go home from the office, but that I know will never get done. In actuality, this innocuous blue folder is a black hole where things go in, but never come back out. In February, I’ll probably do my bi-annual cleansing of the black hole and find the order form for the perfect Christmas present for the Older One that I filled out, but never mailed. That perfect gift was also supposed to be a graduation present.
Oh, well…the fancy label on the folder says, “Take Home”, it does not say “Take Action”. I take it home every day. I’m good.
Renegade Mio. I have come to enjoy a little splash of Mio Liquid Water Enhancer with my daily hydration…except for today when the squirt of Orange Tangerine bounced off an ice cube, ricocheted off my keyboard and left a trail of destruction down the front of my pants.
Oh, well…I always have looked good in orange and in stripes. It’s a fashion statement!
Overbooked Wednesdays. I still don’t know why I thought scheduling the Young One’s vision therapy appointments on the same night as Brownie Scout meetings was a good idea. I guess I figured since we were already in the car, we might as well go somewhere else. The fact that the two meeting times are 30 minutes apart, but the two destinations are 40 minutes apart apparently didn’t factor into the decision. I was never very good with numbers.
Oh, well…Frito-Lay made pre-packaged peanut butter crackers for those times when your mother overbooks your life and you have to eat dinner in-transit.
Email Hording. A few weeks ago, my cube-mate shared with me that her measure of success is how few email she has in her inbox. She starts to panic if she has to scroll down the screen to get to the end of her email list. I nodded my agreement and quickly angled my monitor away. What would she think if she saw I had 784 messages in my inbox? (And this was before last week’s Reply All fiasco.) I just have a little problem with getting rid of emails after I respond to them.
Oh, well…what can I say. The Delete button scares me.
Momma’s Closet for Wayward Stuff. This is otherwise known as the foyer closet, and it is where I directed the moving team (aka the Hubs) to put all the things I didn’t want to deal with on moving day. Now, three months later, I can’t find the Young One’s winter coat or my tennis shoes, and I swear I used to have an ironing board.
Oh well…sounds like a perfect excuse to go shopping to me!
I’m sure I’m forgetting something…like that little light on my dashboard that says, “check engine,” and the funky smell coming out of the refrigerator.
Here’s to the chaos swirling around me every day and the fact that in spite of all the meetings and the to do lists and the things I forget in between, I somehow manage to survive…and get up the next morning to do it all again.