The Twelve Day of Christmas Shopping

I consider myself a semi-professional shopper. My day job keeps me from attaining full professional status, unfortunately.

I live for a day at the mall and a spur-of-the-moment outlet shopping spree, but I really dislike what traditional Christmas shopping has become…too many people, lines that take forever to get to the front of, and doors that open well before I’ve had my first cup of coffee.

Christmas Shopping

Picture Source: Eric Mueller (cc by 2.0)

So today, while I monitor my email for the best Cyber Monday deals, I’ve decided to pen a little tribute this most wonderful time of the year….

On the first day of Christmas shopping,
My true love gave to me
A newspaper full of great deals.

On the second day of Christmas shopping,
My true love gave to me
Two per person limits
And a newspaper full of great deals.

On the third day of Christmas shopping,
My true love gave to me
Three-hour checkouts,
Two per person limits
And a newspaper full of great deals.

On the fourth day of Christmas shopping,
My true love gave to me
Four shopping carts,
Three-hour checkouts,
Two per person limits
And a newspaper full of great deals.

On the fifth day of Christmas shopping,
My true love gave to me
Five promo codes,
Four shopping carts,
Three-hour checkouts,
Two per person limits
And a newspaper full of great deals.

On the sixth day of Christmas shopping,
My true love gave to me
Six doors a-busting,
Five promo codes,
Four shopping carts,
Three-hour checkouts,
Two per person limits
And a newspaper full of great deals.

On the seventh day of Christmas shopping,
My true love gave to me
Seven cards a-maxing,
Six doors a-busting,
Five promo codes,
Four shopping carts,
Three-hour checkouts,
Two per person limits
And a newspaper full of great deals.

On the eighth day of Christmas shopping,
My true love gave to me
Eight crowds amassing,
Seven cards a-maxing,
Six doors a-busting,
Five promo codes,
Four shopping carts,
Three-hour checkouts,
Two per person limits
And a newspaper full of great deals.

On the ninth day of Christmas shopping,
My true love gave to me
Nine shoppers fighting,
Eight crowds amassing,
Seven cards a-maxing,
Six doors a-busting,
Five promo codes,
Four shopping carts,
Three-hour checkouts,
Two per person limits
And a newspaper full of great deals.

On the tenth day of Christmas shopping,
My true love gave to me
Ten blisters swelling,
Nine shoppers fighting,
Eight crowds amassing,
Seven cards a-maxing,
Six doors a-busting,
Five promo codes,
Four shopping carts,
Three-hour checkouts,
Two per person limits
And a newspaper full of great deals.

On the eleventh day of Christmas shopping,
My true love gave to me
Eleven mommas swearing,
Ten blisters swelling,
Nine shoppers fighting,
Eight crowds amassing,
Seven cards a-maxing,
Six doors a-busting,
Five promo codes,
Four shopping carts,
Three-hour checkouts,
Two per person limits
And a newspaper full of great deals.

On the twelfth day of Christmas shopping,
My true love gave to me
Twelve wrappers wrapping,
Eleven mommas swearing,
Ten blisters swelling,
Nine shoppers fighting,
Eight crowds amassing,
Seven cards a-maxing,
Six doors a-busting,
Five promo codes,
Four shopping carts,
Three-hour checkouts,
Two per person limits
And a newspaper full of great deals!!!!

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